'If I wasna teetotal,' Willie added in a burst of generosity, 'I wud stan' ye a drink.' VIII CORRESPONDENCE Macgregor to Christina MY DEAR CHRISTINA, I was looking for your letter the whole of yesterday, but it did not come till this morning at 8.35 a.m., and I am sorry to say it is not near as nice as I expected.

I wud ha'e let ye enjoy yer pairty in peace, but what wi' the forebodin's o' ma auld frien' an' the scent o' the hens an' pigs, I could thole nae longer.

'If I wasna teetotal,' Willie added in a burst of generosity, 'I wud stan' ye a drink.' VIII CORRESPONDENCE Macgregor to Christina MY DEAR CHRISTINA, I was looking for your letter the whole of yesterday, but it did not come till this morning at 8.35 a.m., and I am sorry to say it is not near as nice as I expected.

I iver tuk a hand infour-and-twenty privates an' a officer av the line in review ordher, an' not as much as wud dust a fife between 'em all in the way of clothin'."

But he promptly replied, "Yis, but owd Edwards were a soight too cliver; he were that mean he slew nobbutt a wankling cauf as were bound to deny anny road; if he had nobbutt tekken his best cauf it wud hev worked reight enuff; 'tain't in reason that owd skrat 'ud be hanselled wi' wankling draffle.

'I wud ha'e excused ye under the unique circumstances,' she said graciously.

' 'She wud pairt wi' her last farden for ma sake!' 'Ach, awa' an' eat grass!

'If I could afford it, I wud stan' ye a feed.'

I iver tuk a hand infour-and-twenty privates an' a officer av the line in review ordher, an' not as much as wud dust a fife between 'em all in the way of clothin'."

I wud ha'e let ye enjoy yer pairty in peace, but what wi' the forebodin's o' ma auld frien' an' the scent o' the hens an' pigs, I could thole nae longer.

She startit yatterin' at me the nicht because I askit her for saxpence; so at last I tell't her I wud suner jine Kitchener's nor see her ugly face for anither week.

'If the Clyde was handy, I wud gang an' droon masel'!'

'I wud ha'e naething to dae wi' the weemen if I was you.

'I think I wud practise on a cocoa-nut, Jimsie,' she said, with a small laugh.

And Mr. Robinson once more blundered and caused his son to blush by saying: 'He wud rayther spend the evenin' wi' his intendedeh, Macgreegor?'

He stared at her. 'Firstly, I never said I wud tak' the ring for keeps,' she proceeded.

'If you an' me was gaun oor lane to restewrant, I wud tak' ye on; but' 'Aw, ye mean it wudna be the thing a tea pairty?' 'Hardly.' 'Weel, weel,' said Willie, with sorry resignation, 'honest money's ill to earn.

'If you an' me was gaun oor lane to restewrant, I wud tak' ye on; but' 'Aw, ye mean it wudna be the thing a tea pairty?' 'Hardly.' 'Weel, weel,' said Willie, with sorry resignation, 'honest money's ill to earn.

My dear sur, do ye s'pose I wud talk about the goddessI mean, yer daughterto the likes o' MazaroI say to the likes

I wud like to tell ye somethingno as an excuse, for it wud be nae excuse, but jist to get quit o' the thingaboot the time when ye was in Aberdeen' 'Oh, never!' 'Jist that.

If I had kent for sure, I wud ha'e been knittin' ye socks instead o' a silly tie for yer birthday.' 'Ha'e ye been knittin' a tie for me?' 'Uh-hastrictly platonic, of course.

' 'She wud pairt wi' her last farden for ma sake!' 'Ach, awa' an' eat grass!

Weel, I had a late pass that nicht, an' I thocht I wud miss seein' ma aunt's ugly for wancethough it meant missin' a guid meal forbye.

Oh, they weemen!' 'If ye hadna a face for pies already, I wud gi'e ye yin!' 'Ah, but ye daurna strike a man that's been wounded in his country's service.

Jings, I wud that!' 'Dinna boast,' said his mother.