He had been aware, in a dim fashion, of the rising of Mrs. Jobson some time before, and in a semi-conscious condition had taken over a large slice of unoccupied territory.

Mr. Jobson, fingering his bristly chin, stood: regarding the collection with a wan smile.

" "It's very kind of you all," said Mr. Jobson, feebly"very, but" "They've all been doing without things themselves to do it," interjected his wife.

" "Well, if nobody knows, it don't matter," said Mr. Jobson.

Mother and children, delighted with the success of their scheme, laughed applause, and Mr. Jobson somewhat gratified at the success of his retort, sat down and attacked his breakfast.

" Mrs. Jobson smiled, and, going to the cupboard, produced, with a smile of triumph, an envelope containing seven dangerous-looking cigars.

Mr. Jobson whistled, and taking one up examined it carefully.

They had just finished them when a swish and rustle of skirts sounded from the stairs, and Mrs. Jobson and the girls, beautifully attired, entered the room and stood buttoning their gloves.

"You get round me like, so as to hide me a bit," entreated Mr. Jobson, as they quitted the house.

He regarded Mr. Jobson with dilated eyeballs, and, as the party approached, sank slowly into a sitting position on his doorstep, and as the door opened behind him rolled slowly over onto his back and presented an enormous pair of hobnailed soles to the gaze of an interested world.

" "They wouldn't be that," said Mrs. Jobson.

" "Well done!" said the delighted Mrs. Jobson.

" Mr. Bert Jobson drained his saucer thoughtfully.

"Picking your teeth with your finger is wrong, too," said Mr. Jobson, taking a breath.

"What cold tubs?" "The cold tubs me and Bert ought to 'ave," said Mr. Jobson.

" "And what about me and the gals?" said the amazed Mrs. Jobson.

"It don't signify," said Mr. Jobson.

" Mr. Jobson took a book from his pocket, and opening it at a certain page, handed it over to her.

Mr. Jobson shook his head at her, and after eating his breakfast with great care, wiped his mouth on his handkerchief and went into the shop.

Even when, satisfied with his own appearance, he set to work to improve that of Mrs. Jobson, that admirable woman made no complaint.

"I don't feel splendid," sighed Mrs. Jobson to her husband.

"These 'ere boots feel red-'ot." "Your usual size," said Mr. Jobson, looking across the road.

She set her lips together and plodded on, Mr. Jobson chatting cheerily and taking no notice of the fact that she kept lurching against him.

" She leaned against the iron palings of a house for support, while Mr. Jobson, standing on the kerb, looked up and down the road for a cab.

If she thinks that she can squeedge those little tootsywootsies of 'ers into them boo'" The door slammed violently and left him exchanging grins with Mr. Jobson.