" "Prisident Madison will tell yez to moind yer own business," the Hibernian answered.

" VANITY MCGORRY"I'll buy yez

Not a word, or I'll clap yez in the guardroom.

Thereon several boys would cry, "Ali, no! yez not!

"Dare yez to answer me when I puts a question to yez?"

ALARM CLOCKS MIKE (in bed, to alarm-clock as it goes off)"I fooled yez that time.

I directed this fountain to be built round with stone, and formed a cistern of lime and mortar ten yez by ten.

"Sure you're such a liar Oi don't know whether to belave yez or not.

"Whisht nowit's come out an' kill yez he will.

But, plaze Hivin, the next time I meet yez, I won't be, and thin I'll till yez what I think of yez!"

Sure the old rogue up there will have no call to keep them wanst the boy has paid up the bit yez owe him.

When I axes yez anything an' yez spakes I'll have yez tried for insolence to yer superior officer, but if yez don't answer when I questions yez, I'll have yez punished for disobedience of orders!

"Ye cussid lithle hay then," cried Patsey to the mule; "I'll taych yez to sarve an honist b'y sich a thrick ez thet, noo.

SHE ASKED GENTLY.] "Don't let yez daddy hear yez," she said to them.